Screwed up...

I looked at you
And said yes
To his proposal

I knew it wasn't right
But I even knew you
Weren't by my side

Everyone was happy
Except me

And then the life went back
It should have been laughter
Not sorrow
Should have been blissful
Not horror

I did the unthinkable
And let go of him
Only to find you
And the road's bend

I started erasing the past
And building a future
Dreams. hopes and choices
I thought I was the wisest

I never knew
History would repeat
And you would give up on me

I thought we were together
Because of you I had that stupid grin
I never thought it would dim

I never thought we would part ways
And never look each other's face

You left me with scars so deep
It's difficult to look beyond
And peep

I lay in my bed
Thinking about you
And cry at the times
Wasted for you

Now I do not cry
For the tears have dried
You have ripped my heart
And said Good Bye

A part of me wants to
Get back to routine
But I know I have changed
And no more the girl
Who embraced life
But someone who is
Screwed up
And doesn't wish to
Be alive.

The Girl!!!

She was a girl
Who wanted to run
In the Wild
Sometimes leaving her
Sanity and run like a child

She was a girl
Who loved flowers, surprises
And love notes dropped
Around the corners

She was a girl
Who had her world
Beyond boundaries
And hoped someday
Someone would fulfill
Her eccentricities

She was a girl
Half mad
Looking out for someone
Who was her match

Words and expressions
Were her favorite of all
Which resonated passion
Without the need
To touch at all

Cut to now...

She is the girl
Who walks the path
With caution and thought

She is a girl
For whom
Family dinners, kids and in laws
Have taken the priority

She is the girl
Who shut her world
So that she shouldn't be bothered

She is the girl
Who is now mature and sane
Her eccentricities locked away
And the key lost somewhere

But she is still the girl
For whom
Words and expressions
Are her favorite of all
Which resonates passion
Without the need
To touch at all